BUSY.

We've been busy around here.  I definitely can't wait for everything to slow down a little bit.  Christmas is next week, which seems crazy.  I can't wait to see the family, though.  And I'm really excited to see how Jackson likes Christmas this year.  He liked it last year, but is going to be so much more involved this year.  We have all of our Christmas shopping finished, which is a huge relief.  Man, that really adds up quick.  So now we're just waiting around for the thousand places we have to go!

We're also moving.  And I've been procrastinating packing all of our shit up.  We're officially moving on January 3rd.  We're leaving this one bedroom apartment and moving into a two bedroom house.  The bedrooms are tiny, but there will be so much more space for all of us.  And there is a fenced in back yard.  Hallelujah!  Oh, and a washer and dryer!  I am so damn excited! haha

I'll photobomb some other time.

Ramblings from my head

Sometimes I feel like I need to write things down, because saying them out loud probably isn't the best idea, haha.  And since nobody really reads this…I'm golden.

I've had a hard time with my expectations, especially after Jackson was born.  I expected so much more from some people.  I think that's one of my biggest faults.  I expect people to do things the way I would and some people just aren't capable.  That's pretty general, but definitely worse when it comes to Jackson.  I thought everybody would want to spend time with him…and that doesn't seem to be the case.  I don't know how so many people can miss out on how awesome he is.  I try to tell myself that he'll be ok, and he will be.  I have to keep telling myself that they're missing out, not him.  Which is 100% true.  I honestly feel so sorry for those people.  You're missing out on something so cool.

I also have a hard time with favoritism.  The worst feeling is knowing that your child is going to experience hurt and not being able to do a damn thing about it.  We, as parents, just need to do our best to teach them to be good people and learn to cope with all the things they have to face.  That still doesn't make it any easier.  I'm sure this feeling is going to intensify when he starts to realize.  Fingers crossed that I don't lose my shit, haha.

Something related, but still un-related.  I think I might be having a serious case of baby-fever.  Having a miscarriage makes it so much harder for me.  But I have to be able to fit in a wedding dress, so Jacksie will have to wait for siblings.  I keep thinking about if I were still pregnant.  I would know a gender and be dangerously close to having another child.  I keep thinking about all the potential.  What he/she would be like.  That's such a weird thing to think about.  And I know I shouldn't think like that.  At least everything happened early, instead of worse things happening.  And everything happens for a reason.  I'm pretty sure it's the boom of babies/pregnancies.  And I'm sure it'll pass.  Wedding planning will probably help take my mind off things.  And maybe it's just a phase.  Regardless, it still sucks.

Maybe today just isn't my day, haha.  I need a drink.

Update.

I wanted to write down a quick update.

Jackson had his 18 month well-baby checkup.  He's 75% for height and I think 50% for weight.  Head is still off the charts.  His weight is finally coming back up, though.  Everything else is good, or advanced…I guess.  He's still the same little fireball that he always has been.  His face is finally healing up from all of his run-ins with sidewalks, so that's good.  His language comprehension is still better than his language production, but that's normal.  He's still a little jabber box, though.

Finnegan had his checkup yesterday.  He's not actually 12 weeks until Sunday, but I refuse to deal with the chaos that happens on Fridays and Saturdays there.  He's 22.9 pounds, which is huge.  He got his vaccinations and microchipped.  He handled it like a boss.  I still don't think we're going to neuter him, unless he starts showing some not-so-desirable traits that come along with not being fixed.  He's such a good dog.  So thankful that we were able to find him.  He definitely fits right in with our little family.

Christmas is fast approaching.  We've actually got a really good start on everything, thank god.  I keep saying I don't want to go overboard with Jackson…but I keep finding things I want to get him.  I'm such a sucker.  I wanted to stick to the something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read.  Definitely haven't.  Damn it.  We're lucky we only have Jackson, or we'd be in trouble, haha.  I really want to make some ornaments this year, so I'm looking forward to that.  Jackson will be thrilled, I'm sure.

Wedding….oh, wedding.  I haven't really done anything wedding related for awhile.  I know we still have a long time, but not really in wedding-speak.  I wanted to wait until after the holidays.  I did get a salon booked for the big day, so I consider that a success.  Still so much to do, though.  I have a lot of things in my head that I want for sure, but I haven't set them in stone yet.

Jackson vs. Sidewalks

Jackson has had a rough couple days :(  We took Finnegan to the vet on Thursday to get his 9 week shots and had an accident there.  When we were walking out, Jackson let go of my hand and took off running down the sidewalk.  And down he went.  Face first.  

I ran over and picked him up and he was already covered in blood.  He has a bruise in the middle of his forehead, a scab on the side, and his nose is tore up.  Instead of going home, I just went by the hospital because grandma works there.  We got him all cleaned up and went home.  We just needed to watch the swelling in his nose to make sure it didn't shut.  He was totally fine afterwards.

AND then....we took him to a costume judging Saturday evening.  He was the OBVIOUS winner and the stupid ladies didn't even LOOK at him.  Oh, I was mad, haha.  Seriously, they didn't even take one look at his costume.  So we left.  We went to Darrin's mom and Jackson tripped on the sidewalk.

So, we ended up in the ER.  It was pretty deep and we wanted to make sure it didn't need stitches.  Thankfully, it didn't.  They used some dermabond to glue it shut and some steri strips.  That was awful enough...I can't imagine him getting stitches.  They had to hold him down and he was screaming and looking at me.  Definitely cried.  He didn't even get to do any trick-or-treating.  Poor guy :(

So he's lookin' pretty banged up and bruised, but still cute as ever.  I moved his well baby up for a follow up, so hopefully all that goes well.  I don't think he'll need any shots, because he's current on everything.  I'm sure that appointment will be awful, though.  AND I doubt we get to take him to BOO at the ZOO or trunk-or-treat... Jackson's costume has blood on it.  I blame the stupid red hat ladies!  We're coming back next year and they WILL look at us!

Meet Finnegan!!

Finnegan is the newest addition to the Gordon family!  He's a Golden Retriever and he's the cutest puppy I've ever seen.  He was only 6 weeks when we got him.  He had his first set of shots and stuff the morning we picked him up.  We've only had him a week and I can't imagine not having him.  He fits in with us perfectly.  We picked him out through pictures, so I was a little nervous.  I have always wanted to go and "the puppy pick us."  I didn't even need to see the other puppies when we picked him up.  We fell in love instantly!  He was such a chubby little thing.  And they said that he was the snuggly one!  I love snuggly puppies!  He has quite the personality.  I've never actually had a little puppy, so it's crazy to see how fast they grow.  I didn't even know puppies teethed before!  He's started to come out of his shell.  He runs around like a wild man, especially outside.  He loves to play with Polka Dot and Jackson.  His first night was pretty awful, though.  He did not sleep at all.  He kept wanting to snuggle with Polka Dot, but she wasn't having it.  She was still pissed.  She'll let him cuddle up to her now, though.  We got him a ticking clock and a little area set up and he slept really good the second night.  We decided not to crate train, so we just put a gate up in the doorway.  So far it has worked out really well.  Fingers crossed that it continues to work.  He's starting to get the hang of potty training, but still has a lot of accidents.  We've finally got him to all dry food, instead of mixed.  And we've started a feeding routine, so he has less messes.

Update on Jackson:  He's a beast.

Disclaimer:  Ignore the Finnegan's "business".  I'm still getting used to puppy penis, myself.

What is wrong with people?

Seriously, what is wrong with people?  I am constantly reminded of people just sucking at life lately.  It makes my heart hurt.  I don't want Jackson growing up thinking its okay to get over on people as long as it benefits him.  Because that is NOT okay.  I've been searching around for golden retriever puppies for Jackson.  I saw an ad for a puppy in Lincoln, IL, which isn't too far from here.  I emailed the person and they emailed me back with a list of questions.  When I answered, the email I got back just seemed suspicious.  They wanted to ship the dog, instead of us coming to get him.  Because she was in "London, England."  No, ma'am.  I am no idiot.  I asked for their number and they never responded.  Darrin was then convinced that they were going to come steal Jackson, which triggered a lot of things happened.  I called the Illinois State Police and went to our local police station.  I then reported the original ad and deleted my Facebook.  I'm sure I looked like a total crazy person, but that's okay.  What is wrong with people?  Why try to scam people?  That's just so sad.  The even scarier part is that it is so easy to find information about people, which is why I deleted my Facebook.

Anyway, all is well and we did find a puppy.  We have to wait 2 weeks for it, because he's only 4 weeks old right now.  I'm not sure how I can wait 2 WHOLE weeks!

St. Louis Zoo trip

I cannot wait for fall.  I know...I'll be kicking myself for saying that later.  I just can't wait for him to start wearing some of his other cute clothes.  And all the fun things that go along with fall.  Like the pumpkin patch (which I am VERY excited for), Halloween, hoodies, outside, walks, smores, snuggling, etc.  Anyway, we went to the zoo over the weekend.  Honestly, we picked a bad day to go.  I want to take him again with it's a little cooler.  It was just so hot, which was awful for us and the animals weren't out like they normally would be.  A lot of the exhibits were closed for construction, too.  We still had a good time, though.  Jackson LOVED the animals in tanks, like the sea lions and hippos.  He likes to be able to go up to the tank and look, instead of being in a stroller or carried.  And those animals get close enough for him to really look at them.  I've really been wanting to take him to Shedd's, but this made that even worse!  I know he would absolutely love it!  He also really liked the goats...weird kid.

Daddy ran a 5k and got a medal...this is his reaction.  Clearly thrilled

Preview of Halloween...I can't even wait!